The Fatal Glass Of Incendiary

It was about the fourth drink, as I recall.

People kept BUYING them for me, and egging me on to DRINK them. Tricky, certainly, but not impossible. I did kind of wonder why complete strangers were buying me flaming rum drinks, but far be it from me to turn down a freebie.

Well, around the fourth one, I kind of overdid it, and wound up accidentally spilling a little. Interestingly enough, it soaked my beard, which did not burn, but the flames crisped my mustache and nose hairs. A wonder I didn't inhale the flames and hurt myself.

Fortunately, by then I was drunk enough not to panic, and I simply reached over and picked up my Coca-Cola chaser and dumped it on my face, putting out the flames.

Got quite a round of applause.

It was only after that that someone told me you were supposed to blow out the flames before you drank the damn drink. Nobody had told ME that. Apparently, they didn't know I didn't know that, either, and people kept buying me the fraggin' things to watch the daredevil up at the bar slam down a drink while it was still actually on fire...